Guess who's back

Yes, my minions, I have returned from the cold, black hiatus that swallowed me.
I came to present to you: EFFING WORMS by Effing Games. This game does so many things so very right, it is just perfect for a lunch break or the short periods between two assignments.

Doesnt this scream "AWESOME!"?

If you are like me and enjoy cheesy horror flicks then you will enjoy this game just as much as I did.
In a nutshell you are a worm and you want to eat. Humans, Cows, Dogs, Tanks, Choppers, Mechs, Hovertanks... all that good stuff. And that is all you do. Inbetween levels, you get to upgrade your worm and get neat features, like spikes or a different type of skin.

Today's weather: Sunshine with a ninety percent chance of angry worm.

The problem? You can only choose one of two upgrades and you can make that choice only once. So you always have to think: "Do I want a fast worm, or do I want more health?"
However you decide, you grow in size and abilities until you become a massive monster and destroy everything that dares to walk around above ground.
The easy controls make this a blast. The worm steers sort of like a car in a racing game (see Freeway Fury), except that you will be drawn down by gravity if you are above ground. However, jumping out of the ground to snatch some choppers out of mid air is just more fun this way.

All of this is topped off with a nice icing of witty comments and the little elements, like protestors holding peace signs and commentatory to your upgrades.
I also really enjoyed the punk-rock soundtrack that is cranked up every time you come above ground, especially because it is quite cheesy.
Unfortunately this game is not perfect. It is very short and very easy, after level 5 or so you will not find any enemies that could pose a real threat to you and two levels later you find yourself in sandbox mode, where you are killing people aimlessly just to see that little score number on the bottom right corner rise.
Which is probably why Notdoppler gave this game a 13+ rating, because it degrades human life.
...
Not like I care. OM NOM NOM!

The simple things.

It's the simple things that make me smile. Like fully-automated high caliber turrets that blast away at undead hordes while you kick back and enjoy a nice glass of white russian. Or people wearing red headbands while handling weapons that would rip a normal human's arms off. But the man I talk about is not a normal human. He is the main character of a Seant Cooper game series: Boxhead.
So far, there are five installments of the game: Boxhead: the rooms, Boxhead: More Rooms, The Halloween Special (which I believe to be the original one), Boxhead 2 Play (with multiplayer!) and the newest one Boxhead, The Zombie wars. Imma just go ahead and review the latter, if you don't mind.

I really like this scenic display of boxheaded zombies right here.

 The idea is just as simple as the graphics are: you are alone, you have guns, there are zombies which are after the soft, grey matter in your box-shaped head. And as always, the simple concepts are the best ones. The more zombies you kill in a row, the higher your combo-counter rises, the higher your combo-counter, the more upgrades and weapons you get.

Just don't get cornered...

 That is about all I have to say about the game mechanics of this series. There are a few things that set these games apart from the other zombie-shooters: for one this one does not try too hard to look good. There are so many games out there that try to create a creepy atmosphere but utterly fail. The boxhead games however just rely on action, action and even more action. You end up slamming your space key into oblivion in a fruitless attempt to hold off hordes and hordes of zombies. Especially the Boxhead 2 Play with it's co-op multiplayer and the fabolous possibility to wall yourself in with explosive barrels to mass-slaughter the undead does a really good job in creating a unique action experience for two people.

Turrets: the lazy man's choice for letting the dead rest.

 The Zombie wars one however is a little different. Not only does it feature new graphics, 3 new zombie types and completely different levels, it also gives you turrets. That's right: turrets. Automatic little thingies you put somewhere that just take out rotting walkers on their own. Just like that.
Amazing concept. Unfortunately this does not come without a prize: the devils became a lot stronger in this one, instead of just throwing fireballs they now launch entire firewalls at you that will destroy everything in their way (except for their little friends). Also their ammunition is quite limited, so in the end you rely on running around and going toe to toe with those smelly white-shirts as before. But trust me, that never gets old.

Turrets can't do the job alone :(

So if you have the time, and if you like shooting zombies, you should definitely check these games out. They will entertain you for hours and hours.

Bubbles and other things.

Allright, first things first. I decided I will from now on update this blog every monday. For one because I have too much real life stuff going on for daily updates but on the other hand, I want to give you guys something to read here on a realistic, regular basis. That's why I chose monday: once a week is just enough and it gives you something new to kill your time in the office or at school with for the week.

In other related "news": I hope you already know this but you can download GTA I and II on the Rockstar Games page! Like, the actual real games! Especially GTA 2 is a lot of fun (I dont know if I am just saying this because I grew up with these games) and you can even play it in multiplayer (though there is noone, who is able to beat me) which rocks. So if you can install shit on your computer, you oughta do that.

But now to the game I wanted to review today:

Pew Pew, Am I right?

 Today I am letting you take a look at a game called Bubble Shooter.  At the first look it is just one of these games where you shoot bubbles at a mass of bubbles while new ones are generated at the top of the screen. This is true, but there is more to it. For example, the new ones on top are generated whenever you run out of bubbles to shoot (see the bottom left side of the screenshot), which makes you think twice or three times about where to shoot once you are in a serious situation.

Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaw balls.

This adds a strategic element and actually... makes this game pretty addictive. Not THAT addictive, but still, you will play it for a while once you started.

Allright, that's it for today. One more thing though: I am having trouble with my adsense. For some reason my account is still being checked even though I applied for that stuff about a month ago... Someone else having trouble with this?

How to easily kill hours of your life

Allright, everybody was talking about this Minecraft, so obviously I had to check it out. It appears as if it is in it's alpha stage and you have to pay to play the actual alpha, but there seems to be a pre-alpha version you can try and mess around with. While doing that my clock just skipped three hours ahead, even though I was supposed to do something completely different.
There are no objectives or goals in minecraft yet, but the developers promise for this to change soon.
I do believe, however that this is not necessary. You run around in a randomly generated 3d world and can create and destroy the blocks that this world is made up from. Very easy concept. Apparently in the alpha version you can also build railroad tracks and stuff that actually works. Sweet.
So yeah, all I did the last three hours was run around and build stuff. Check this out:

First, I built a little temple

Then this menacing tower...

And then added an underground library.

Sort of like a metaphor for the modern work-environment.

Imagine this: you are an eraser-like looking object in a two dimensional world that hast to flee from lava coming from the ground while avoiding bricks that look like condom wrappers. Picture this with repetetive electro music and you get "Avalanche!".
The concept, as I just told you is ridicolously simple: bricks rain out of the sky (I wonder what meteorologists would say to that) while the screen gets filled with a red, transparent liquid through a pipe in the ground. A game description titled this liquid as "lava", though I fail to see lava being transparent. And having a flat surface. But whatever, this is not the point.

Am I the only one who thinks that the bricks look a little like condom wrappers?

The point afterall, is entertainment. And back in the day it just took a yellow circle eating white dots while being chased by blobs in 4 colours for that. And now we have more than 16 colours and don't have to use midi anymore. Which brings me to the only aspect of the game that really annoys me: the music. Yes, it is neat to hear the soundtrack "Dreams From Above" by "Maze Master" once. Or twice. Maybe a third time is fine, too. But after that it just gets annoying. And there is no way to turn it off. Dear game designers: don't do that. Some of us got our own music to listen to and would love to carry on listening.
Whatever. I wasn't done talking about the game. Because jumping up isn't enough. You can also jump from the SIDES of the blocks. And you can jump on blocks that are still in the air. But don't get excited just yet, because it becomes a necessity once the lava rises too quick to stay on the blocks that already landed.

Aw balls.

Your goal is simply to survive, which can be quite difficult considering that the lava burns you and the blocks crush you. And sometimes you just get trapped. Which is especially annoying if you already reached 260 ft.
And can someone tell me why exactly the blocks would have a hole in the middle? Did the game designers want to save money on material? Is there some subliminal message involved? Where the blocks too heavy before and wouldn't fall slow enough? Does it have something to do with aerodynamics?
No one knows.
Anyhow, I really recommend you check out Avalanche and try to beat my 520 ft. I didn't include a screenshot, because I forgot. You'll just have to believe me on this one.